I engaged in a talk with this girl from class whom I had spotted a while back. I told her how much I was into her and would like us to be a couple. She looked at me and did not talk for about a minute which made me wonder. She then told me that she was going to think about it. Even after that she told me nothing about her apart from her name I did this hoping that I would gain her trust so that she could believe whatever I was telling her. Well it kind of worked out a little bit to my advantage, for a moment I thought I had control over the situation, and in a way it made me feel more comfortable with her thinking that I had things in control. Little did I know that I was giving the wrong impression is one of the cons, she confused me for wanting to be her friend while I intended on becoming her boyfriend.
Moreover, it was not mutual since the fact that I disclosed information about myself meant that she is also supposed to do so but she did not. Therefore, I ended up not knowing much about her. With regard to self-disclosure based on my experience I gained two guidelines that are important to me, one is that disclose only information that is not sensitive or important to you and secondly the process of self-disclosure has to be two-way thing. By disclosing information that is less sensitive to oneself the chances of one getting hurt is minimal. The other thing is as I disclose information about myself so should the other person, I should not be the only one doing so.
I was dating this girl a while ago and with time I realized that I actually did not like her since she was the one who kept on pressurizing me about a relationship. So one time when we were out with my friends she came to us and told them how much I loved her and then she dared me to deny it so I decided to evade the question and did not answer it.
I continuously evaded answering that question since I knew it would really embarrass the girl and that and that it would reveal to her that I do not love her which will hurt her even more so I decided on maintaining my silence which to me was golden. There are situations that necessitate one to be ethical and hence need one to use an alternate to self-disclosure. It would be ethical to evade certain things when it comes to self-disclosure. Pertaining to this an example is when we are likely not to defy statements that to us are untrue and are known to us.