One of the subjects that has been exposed to intensive research throughout the years is human relationships. It is said that humans are the most complex of all beings created and to fully understand them would take thousands of years of research. Human relationships, especially those between and men are said to be hugely complex and incomprehensible. This has not however stopped social scientists from conducting intensive research trying to demystify the concept of human relationships, particularly those between men and women. This subject has also been explored in pop culture, particularly in films and television series. There are currently very many programs on prime time television that explore the subject of relationships between men and women. In addition, there is a wide variety of films that explore the same. Ultimately, one deduction that can be made from a many of the films on men and women relationship is that love is a subjective term and, in fact, there exists several types of love and relationships. This essay aims to explore this issue and show that relationships exists in various formats and are motivated by different aspects. The essay will utilize two specific films to explore more on this issue.
The first kind of love or relationship is the one that is based on compromise. In this kind of love, two people enter into a relationship after making an agreement that has its basis on comfort. This may, for example, be based on emotional or financial stability.
In this kind of relationship, the aspect of comfort causes a couple to stick together even when it is clear that a relationship is bound to end. For example, partners may be worried about their emotional and financial stability when they break up and consequently, they may find it hard to even contemplate breaking up (Tzeng 34). This therefore acts a motivator of the relationship. This kind of love or relationship is very interesting sometimes because even though the relationship may be based on an aspect of comfort, couples become so used to each other that it seems like they fully connect and understand each other when this may not be the case.
A love relationship that is based on compromise resembles a situation where couples settle for each other. Some people spend a lot of time being single that they think that time is running out for them. One may spend several years looking for “true love” but this may not be forthcoming (Tzeng 40). It is at this juncture that people start seeking for alternatives. They look for a person who, for example, is imperfect in their eyes but who possesses some desirable and tolerable qualities, and a relationship, therefore, ensures.
Such a relationship may even lead to the siring of children. The two individuals may be unmarried but may have children together. Once the children are brought into the equation, there is an increased feeling that the two individuals are supposed to stay together. Although the couple may not find fulfillment in the relationship, the relationship may be characterized by comfort and the couple, therefore, stays together (Tzeng 54). However, in this kind of relationship, it is up one individual to decide whether he or she will stay with their respective partner. However, as mentioned earlier, it is often the future of the unknown that keeps couples together. However, once things become too much, one partner may simply decide to walk away from the relationship. This often happens a lot in many relationships based on compromise (Soble 78). One of the couples will eventually get tired of compromise and abandon the relationship.
The other kind of love relationship is the one that is soulful in nature. This is the kind of relationship that seems to indicate that two people are soul mates and are meant to be together forever. It is often said that these kinds of relationships are not many in the world. This is however quite a debatable issue.
Nevertheless, this kind or type of love is characterized by several distinguishable aspects. One of this is a deep connection between the two partners (Tzeng 60). The two partners share an almost unexplainable attraction and connection to each other. Even when some huge barrier comes between the two partners, they somehow find a way to get past the barrier the barrier and get together. The barrier may even be marriage to other partners.
In this kind of relationship, a couple may break up and stay away from each other for a considerable time but in the end, they always end up coming back to each other. They may engage in relationships with other people, but they may find that these relationships do not work because of even the smallest things (Soble 80). In the end, the two people ultimately go back to each other after realizing that they are soulmates and that they would never be happy or content with other persons. However, as mentioned, this does not necessarily mean that soulmates never experience problems. Soulmates experience problems but one major difference between them and other types of relationships is that it is easier to resolve their problems and, therefore, stay together (Tzeng 65).
These two aspects are visible in a variety of films produced and released over the years. The film Kramer vs. Kramer describes a couple who divorce and start fighting for the custody of their son. From the looks of things, this looks like a relationship that could have been initiated based on compromise although the couples never admitted this to each other. At the beginning of the film, Joanna tells Ted that she is leaving him because she is not herself anymore. She informs him that if she remains in the relationship, she might in the coming days kill herself.
These aspects are a revelation of the kind of relationship that the two have. It is clear that Joanna had settled for Ted because for because of a reason such as financial stability; after all, Ted holds a respectable job. In the same breath, it comes across that Ted might have settled for Joanna for the simple purpose of emotional stability or even childbearing. This aspect is brought out by the fact that Ted seems to have little concern for Joanna. He is a workaholic who is completely embroiled in his job and has not time for any emotional connection to his wife. In this kind of relationship, things eventually get too hard for one of the partners and a decision is made to break the relationship.
The aspect of soul mate love is brought out in the film “Falling in Love (1984). In this particular film, two strangers meet and seamlessly fall in love. The two begin as casual friends, they realize just how similar and compatible they are with each other and therefore for them, love is not a choice but rather comes to them without any effort. This is in spite of the fact that they are married to other people. This is nothing short of soul mate love.
As described earlier, soulmates have an effortless connection with each other. They may be strangers in the beginning as it is evident in the film’ ‘Falling in Love”, where Frank and Molly fall in love effortless, but it does not take long for them to realize the level of their compatibility. In this kind of relationship, there is nothing to compromise and it is simply the connection between the partners that guides the relationship.
In conclusion, it is clear that human relationships, especially those between and men are quite complex and incomprehensible. Humans form relationships with each other for all kinds of reasons. As it has been shown, there are two primary types of love relationships between men and women. One kind of relationship, as shown above, is based on compromise. In this kind of relationship, two people make an agreement that has its basis on comfort before entering into a relationship, for example, an agreement based on emotional or financial stability. Additionally, it has been shown that, the aspect of comfort causes a couple to stick together even it is clear that a relationship is bound to end, but one point, one of them is unable to take it anymore and will want out. This is evident in the film Kramer vs. Kramer. The other kind of relationship is the one that is soulful in nature. The main characteristic of this kind of love or relationship is a deep connection between the two partners, as evidenced by Frank and Molly in the film “Falling in Love”.
Tzeng, Oliver CS, ed. Theories of love development, maintenance, and dissolution: Octagonal cycle and differential perspectives. Praeger Publishers, 1992.
Soble, Alan. "The philosophy of sex and love: an introduction." (2008).